Where, heartbeat

I can’t sense your heartbeat anymore
And it sends shivers through me
Where has my heartbeat gone
[it seems to have eloped with yours]
Where has my warmth gone
[it seems to have walked away from me]
Why does my heart seem limp
Is this what death feels like

I stand on the pedestal of joy
And wallow in my green sorrow
For it grows uncontrollably
A storm most desperate to wreck me
Towering high and beneath me
Sweeping from under me, the earth
[were my sanity is planted]
[where my heart is planted]

I am drowning in the emptiness that I drape myself in
It fills my lungs and stuffs my heart
How much sadness can one heart hold?
Can’t these walls burst open and let it flow out?
[in tears, screams, sobs, panic or dance?]
I though, deeply doubt I can
I doubt I can muster the strength for an outflow
[in tears, screams, sobs, panic or dance?]

I am left alone on this stage
Music blaring, voices chanting
They pour on me their excitement
They watch it drool to the floor beneath me
My cold body repels them, fervently
For my warmth is gone, and the shiver is my ally
No! Your joy can’t hang on to me
I’m [deeply] sorry

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